handwriting & voices.

A stack of letters can be a lot like an embrace from someone you love.

However, sometimes they touch your heart and you remember that you are bruised there... by that penmanship... by that person.

This morning I spent some time cleaning out drawers and sorting through stacks of paper in my office. Tucked away in between recipes scribbled on scrap paper were some cards that I knew instantly who they were from, and what their message inside said. I didn't have to open them up, and I didn't have to guess. I knew. Some made me laugh. Some made me want to cry. Some made me sad. Some made me happy. Some... just made my heart ache.

To take this one step further I also found my iPhone 3G. I plugged it in thinking that it'd be great to use it as iPod. After it charged enough the welcome screen came up, and I realized quickly that our phones are themselves- a bit of a time machine. Text messages & voice mails linger still on the device well after we've put it away in the drawer.

Still logged on the phone were messages from last year, and several from last summer.

I sat on the floor of my office with an assortment of piles surrounding me and I listened. To voices. To sentiments. To articulated feelings and thoughts.

My favorites were at the end of July, three messages all left very close to each other on the morning of the 26th. I was grateful all over again for the way in which I have been loved.

But also a bit bruised and missing some friends a lot.

Handwriting and voices are sometimes like that.

And adele just came on my shuffle which sort of just fit the mood.

"I know it ain't easy giving up your heart,

Nobody's perfect,

Trust me I've learned it..."

I just love love love love minute 3:30 how she just breaks it down.

Its.

Just.

My.

Favorite.

And. That's what we can't escape right now.