Small Town Life

In going with the new job, I also chose my small town and this past Thursday I had a small town kind of night. We all went to the Pink Hut (Ice Cream place) in Lexington and brought Gracie and Mogs. Eating ice cream together as the warm day cooled off, and laughing at the dogs brought this sense over my heart knowing "Kari, this is what you stayed for...not for a career, for this simple moment with the dogs, some friends and an ice cream cone." I am not going to pretend its been easy transitioning back into being at home, and how much I miss the glamour of being a full time traveler. I can sense how the honeymoon period of my return home is coming to a pass as some friendships enter in the 'testiness' of constant socialization. It's about now that I would typically head out of town for a little bit, and well... I am not going anywhere, I'm here- so I suppose its the battling through this transition that has begun in some friendships. 

I think what is a challenge for me personally right now is the idea of just wanting easy for a little bit. We are not promised easy, we are not promised anything beyond Christ's salvation for those who believe. I just want more. I want more certainty, I want this transition to be easy, I want training to be easy, and I want in this moment to float through this time in my life unscathed. Such wishing is ridiculous, and I know that I don't really want it to be a piece of cake. I know that the growing and learning is an imperative part of the plan and I don't want to miss it. I think I'm just tired. I want to be less sassy, a little less feisty, more assertive, practice more patience, and understand the love I have in my life with more gratitude. 

So things are otherwise finally settling into a routine. I know when I have to be up in the morning, I have my evening routine back into motion, and I am responding to the alarm clock which I worried I would ignore. The social pace in conjunction with the work pace has been a teetering effect, and I am realizing that ignoring the voice inside that says some alone time is starting to take its toll. 

I have wished for the Ocean, and I have shared with new people the experiences of the past year and what it has meant to me. Consistently being on the go was a tremendous strain that I didn't realize until I stopped. I have felt myself breathe a little deeper now in home life, but I have also sensed the part of my heart curiously wonder what adventure waits next.  While I wrote the book about this past year with discipline before starting work, I have tried to be intentional during the night hours getting through some of it and inserting things that have come to mind since writing particular parts. I have read sections that I have loved and have struggled with connecting what I wrote to the fact it came from me! Is that weird? 

So life continues. This is my 100th entry and according to my blog counter thing I have had 402 views on this blog since it began. I have read through much of the blog while writing the book, and I have been comforted in knowing that I utilized this space to release thoughts and dreams as they happened. I'm glad for the vulnerability and truth behind the words, and I'm moved by the response I have had from those that have read it- those including close friends and those who are acquaintances.